It's 11:56 on a Sunday night.
And yes I have work at 8:00 am tomorrow morning.
I feel so... knotted... I guess, and entrenched in my thoughts that I'm afraid to dream about them and wake up more confused than I am now. The first one is really long, but the rest are just bite sized pieces.
Here's the thing... I'm stuck on some big concepts. And all at the same time, which isn't really fair, if you think about it.
1. Art.
Here's what I hate. The beginning of every art, art history, art criticism class I've ever taken that begins with the inevitable conversation of "What is Art?" The prof expects it to be mind blowing and everyone quickly divides into one of three camps.
a. pre-modernism (lovingly referred to as classicists) They expect art to look like... well... art. Basically, what your darling parents could understand as art. Things like the Renaissance and Neo-Classical eras are perfect, or Impressionism, they love Impressionism.
b. Modernism: Color! Medium! Technique!
c. Post-Modernism: content! Thought! and quality doesn't matter if you don't think it should.
I'm all three.
Which makes for a very confused artist. I'm not set in a medium yet, and the university system can't wait for me to make up my mind. I think that if I haven't tried everything, I don't know what to do.
And that's where I am now. For my next project, God help me, I'm going to work with wood and measurement again, much like my earlier sculpture. I'm going to grid, in pencil and thread, the entire 6x6 expanse of wood. I'm very excited.
Here's why I'm saying all of this. I guess it's because I'm very unsure of myself. The work I do is calculated, and I have little to no talent for rendering, time based processes, or repetitive multi-step processes. I'm worried that I don't have enough raw talent to make it as an artist.
And I desperately want to. More than anything, any other career, I want to be an artist... then a chef... then a society "It" girl who dresses fashionably and smiles for cameras.
2. Identity.
3. Religion
4. Relationships...
Not to leave you with depressing thoughts, dear exceptionally rare reader, here's a great video ad for Prada.
Very fun. (I have an urge for oversized hats with stripes)
Mary, dear, you are an incredible artist. And your indecision on a medium could well be helpful; some of the most striking and effective pieces I've seen have been eclectic mixes. So go do your thing! <3 you very much.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the encouragement Katie. I've taken to drawing with thread... I heart it! It's like sewing and drawing and sculpture. I can't wait to upload the pictures for you to see!
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